Yes, It Pays To Share a Home With Family. But Don’t Pretend It’s a Disney Movie

The Rise of the Multigenerational Commune (aka “Welcome Back to 1971”)

Let’s start with the obvious: Americans are once again discovering the revolutionary concept of… living with their families. Pew Research Center tells us that the number of people living in multigenerational households quadrupled between 1971 and 2021. Translation: the American Dream of “get married, buy a starter home, and banish your parents to Florida” has been repossessed by rising costs, student debt, and the brutal reality that wages haven’t kept up with the price of eggs, let alone mortgages.

So yes, whether it’s your boomer parents clinging to life in your guest suite, or your 27-year-old “entrepreneur” brother still “launching” his podcast empire from your basement, multigenerational housing is back in vogue. Not because we love each other so much, but because Zillow keeps whispering “$4,000 rent for a studio” like a horror movie villain.

Why People Actually Do It (Spoiler: It’s Not “Family Bonding”)

WSJ politely says it’s for “financial issues, caregiving needs, and delayed household formation.” Let me translate:

Financial issues: Everyone’s broke. College grads are earning less than the family dog walker. Boomers bought their houses for the price of a used Honda, but now their kids can’t afford even the HOA fees for a cardboard box on the outskirts of Phoenix.
Caregiving: Someone has to change diapers, whether on a toddler or Grandpa. Might as well consolidate.
Delayed household formation: Young adults aren’t forming their own households. Not because they’re “lazy,” but because landlords now expect a kidney as a security deposit.

It’s not a “trend,” it’s survival.

The Builders Smell Blood (and Profit)

Enter Lennar, Toll Brothers, and every other homebuilder who realized: Wait, people are desperate enough to willingly share kitchens with their in-laws? We can monetize this.

Lennar sells “Next Gen” homes—basically McMansions with an attached “independent” apartment that allows Grandma to live nearby while still pretending she’s not judging your laundry pile. “Two homes in one,” they brag. Cute. Until you realize the model costs about $15,000 more, which is a nice way of saying: “Sure, we’ll let you live with your mom, but only if you pony up for it.”

Toll Brothers is on board too, because nothing says luxury like a $1.3 million house with a built-in suite where your mother-in-law can knit passive-aggressive sweaters.

Even Realtor.com reports that homes with in-law suites are listed 20.6% higher than the market median. Capitalism, baby: even when you’re pooling incomes just to survive, someone’s making sure you pay extra for the privilege.

The Gibson Family Poster Child: The Hallmark Version

The WSJ piece spotlights Darlene and Jim Gibson, who graciously opened their 2,600-square-foot Goodyear, Arizona palace to Jim’s mom, Cheryl. Before, Cheryl was stuck in rural Virginia, lonely and carless. Now she’s thriving: baking, crafting, bingo nights, and losing weight because—gasp—community and human contact make you healthier.

Great story. Beautiful. Heartwarming. But let’s be honest: for every Cheryl baking banana bread in peace, there’s a Grandma barging into the kitchen at 6 a.m. to remind you the bacon is too greasy and your kids are “wild.” For every smooth arrangement, there’s an uncle who “temporarily” crashes in the den and never leaves, or a son-in-law who discovers he can game from the basement until 4 a.m. because rent is free.

But sure, let’s all believe it works flawlessly if everyone just “respects boundaries.”

Boundaries, Agreements, and the Fantasy of Civilized Families

The experts say: Write down expectations, create an exit strategy, and establish financial rules. Lovely advice—if your family members are rational adults who treat each other with corporate HR professionalism.

Let’s reality-check:

Written cohabitation agreement? Try explaining “exit strategy clauses” to your Uncle Bob, who still owes you $500 from 2009 and insists the basement is “his now.”
Revisiting agreements yearly? Families can’t even revisit who hosts Thanksgiving without a shouting match. Good luck with a formal review of the property deed.
Respecting privacy? Tell that to Grandma who wanders into your bedroom unannounced because she “heard a noise.”

This is all technically true advice—but it assumes families act like LLCs instead of messy humans with decades of unresolved trauma.

The Financial “Details” Nobody Wants to Talk About

The article delicately touches on deeds, titles, and mortgages. Let me cut the niceties: if your parents are on the deed, congratulations—you now co-own your house with the people who still call you “kiddo.” If one dies, you might be sharing the title with their weird cousin you’ve met twice. If they hold it in a trust, you’re basically living in a soap opera script.

Oh, and don’t forget to build an “emergency fund” together. Yes, nothing tests family trust like a shared bank account. Because splitting the electric bill wasn’t already enough of a minefield.

The Fantasy vs. The Reality

The WSJ paints multigenerational living as the future: respectful, loving, well-planned. But the reality looks a little more like this:

Privacy? Your “independent suite” has a door, sure. But you still hear Grandpa blasting Fox News at full volume through the wall.
Harmony? Your mom still comments on your cooking like you’re 12. “Honey, maybe less salt?”
Finances? Your brother swore he’d contribute to the emergency fund. He Venmo’d $20 once. Three months ago.
Freedom? Want to stumble into the kitchen in your underwear? Good luck. Family housing is where dignity goes to die.

The Upsides (Because Yes, There Are Some)

Let me be fair: there are upsides.

Childcare: Built-in babysitters. Who needs $2,000/month daycare when Nana will happily watch the kids? (Though she might also teach them that “screens rot your brain.”)
Elder care: You don’t have to panic about nursing homes charging $12,000/month for someone to lose Grandma’s hearing aid.
Financial relief: Splitting mortgage, utilities, and groceries makes survival in this economy… well, possible.
Community: Humans actually thrive when not isolated. Loneliness kills, and even passive-aggressive company beats none.

So yes, it can work. But it’s not “Leave It to Beaver.” It’s more like “Survivor: Suburban Edition.”

Why This All Feels Familiar (Hint: It’s Called “History”)

Let’s not kid ourselves—multigenerational living isn’t some bold, modern experiment. It’s literally how humans lived for millennia. Extended families under one roof were the default before postwar America sold us on the suburban nuclear dream.

The idea that we’re “returning” to it is only shocking if you’ve bought 70 years of marketing that said freedom = cul-de-sac + white picket fence + exile of your parents. Reality check: most of the world never stopped living like this. We’re just late to the reunion because capitalism ate our paychecks.

The Hidden Stress Nobody Prints in the Brochures

You’ll notice WSJ politely frames challenges as “stressful some of the time.” Pew reports 23% of people in multigenerational homes are stressed “all or most of the time.” Which is a polite way of saying nearly a quarter of them are one loud chewing noise away from homicide.

Here’s what doesn’t make the glossy “Next Gen” brochure:

The generational clashes over politics (“Dad, stop telling my kids the election was rigged”).
The fights over thermostat settings (“Who set it to 74? Are we millionaires?”).
The passive-aggressive sticky notes on leftovers in the fridge.
The unspoken resentment when one person contributes more, or cleans more, or simply exists more loudly.

Stress isn’t a bug—it’s the feature.

The Snarky Survival Guide

So, let’s cut through the “just respect each other’s space” fluff and talk survival tactics for real humans:

Noise-canceling headphones. For when Grandpa’s hearing aid feedback meets your nephew’s TikTok volume wars.
Deadbolt on your bedroom. Respecting boundaries is great, but locks are better.
Cash only emergency fund. Because someone will “forget” to Venmo.
Neutral third-party mediator. Aka, the family therapist you’ll inevitably need.
A willingness to embrace chaos. Because no amount of “planning” prepares you for your cousin adopting a rescue ferret without warning.

Conclusion: A Win… With an Asterisk

Yes, multigenerational living pays—financially, emotionally, practically. But only if you’re willing to acknowledge the trade-offs: loss of privacy, inevitable drama, and the joy of hearing your father-in-law clear his throat at 5 a.m.

WSJ wants you to think this is a balanced lifestyle trend. I’ll put it this way: it’s less “trend” and more “forced reboot of old-school survival.” We’re not building family communes because it’s fun—we’re doing it because the economy left us no choice.

But hey, look on the bright side: at least you’ll never have to pay $8 for a latte alone again. Instead, you’ll drink burnt coffee brewed by Dad, while Mom asks if you’ve considered refinancing.

Welcome home.